


Surviving His Skin (Kageyama x Hinata)

by ThatGinjahNinja



Series: Really UnCorking Kagehina [1]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Best Friends, Boys In Love, Declarations Of Love, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Frottage, Grinding, Inspired by Fanart, KageHina - Freeform, Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Love, Making Out, Making Up, Romance, Rutting, Sexual Content, hinakage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-25
Updated: 2016-04-30
Packaged: 2018-06-04 03:55:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 13,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6640387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThatGinjahNinja/pseuds/ThatGinjahNinja
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Both looking up at the same time, Kageyama realized where he was and what he had just done and exactly who he had just done it with. It was irresistible, and his hands flew up to cradle Hinata’s flushed cheeks, as he pulled him in powerfully for their first kiss."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Surviving His Apprehension

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the fabulously gorgeous and sexy comic strip done by [reallycorking](http://reallycorking.tumblr.com/tagged/corkart) over on tumblr. that you should all definitely be certain to check out.
> 
> This particular story was inspired by [Her Work](http://reallycorking.tumblr.com/tagged/did-i-mention-this-is) and her [30 Day NSFW Challenge Art](http://reallyporning.tumblr.com/tagged/30-days-nsfw-challenge) [Day 3: First Time](http://reallyporning.tumblr.com/image/142523819344)
> 
>  
> 
> This will be, at least, two chapters, possibly three.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "He didn’t have much time for questions, though, because in two short strides, Hinata stood before him, so close that his shadow completely darkened the space around Tobio. He wasn’t sure if he should feel discovered or intimidated or excited or anything at all, but again, Hinata gave little time for him to process, as he stood straddling Kageyama’s lap. Still gazing down at him curiously, Hinata’s lip twitched up for just a fraction of a second, and he lowered himself down against his volleyball partner, using the back of the chair for leverage.
> 
> “W-What are—“ Kageyama managed before he felt Hinata’s stiffness and knew for certain it wasn’t one-sided this time. “Hinata,” he tried to question, cheeks fully pink, as his crush sat on his lap, eyes half-lidded, face so very close to his own. “Shit,” he groaned, abandoning his sports’ bottle on the floor."

Kageyama was in trouble now and he knew it. There was no way to overlook what had happened, and though he had told himself he wouldn’t let it affect his playing, it was clear now that it was doing just that. He should have just dropped it. He should have just tried to push forward like everything was normal between them, but the harder he tried to manage, the more frustrated he became.

It wasn’t the same as before, when nothing had happened. It was no longer true that no one knew he would even _want_ to do the things he’d imagined over the last three years. Well, almost no one had known it before.

He had confided to Yamaguchi during a moment of weakness, and had immediately wished he could take it back. His heart had stopped and color had drained from his body. He had never forgotten how he had held his breath, hoping he might actually pass out, while waiting for Yamaguchi to laugh. That hadn't happened, though. His teammate had warmly placed a hand on Kageyama's shoulder. He had offered Kageyama a kind, comforting expression, as if he had already known. Yamaguchi listened patiently, and Kageyama unloaded, for the first time ever. He told Yamaguchi all about how flustered and dizzy and giddy and completely confused he was over the way Hinata affected him. After some truly assuring words that he would take Kageyama's secret to the grave, Yamaguchi had suddenly become his second closest friend.

Aside from his kind-hearted, freckle-faced teammate, before the most recent Friday night, no one else had known what Kageyama was hiding from his closest friend— that he privately longed to touch him…to kiss him…to whisper, “ _I love you, Hinata_ ,” while holding him close.

It was all too late, though, and Kageyama was growing more discouraged and hurt by the day. The longer he dwelled on things, the more wounded he felt, and he wasn’t sure how long he could keep this up. It was only their first full week of regular practices, after all, and things had already turned out this way.

Everything that previous Friday afternoon began as it usually did. Karasuno’s new volleyball captain and co-captain were the first to arrive to the gym for practice, so they could get everything they needed set up. After tying up the net, Kageyama and Hinata, now in their third and final year at Karasuno, rolled out the crate of volleyballs.

It was a big day for the two of them. It was their first official day leading the team, and they would be meeting the new first year club members shortly, once Yamaguchi and Tsukishima brought them by the gym.

The two had talked at length at the end of last year about how their time as leaders of the team would go. They seemed to be on the same page, growing more in sync the longer they had spent time together, until Kageyama could hardly take his eyes off of Hinata.

It wasn’t like he hadn’t been watching him all along. Since that very first game in middle school, Kageyama knew he was watching someone important, he just didn’t know in what way. He couldn’t have known then all that they would go through together or all the things Hinata would show to him. There was no way during that initial match for Tobio to see the boy that would match so perfectly with his tosses or train so hard beside him all these years or patiently teach him how to be a friend.

If Kageyama had known from that game that he would one day find himself so drawn to that infuriatingly confident shrimp on the other side of the net, maybe he could have avoided this whole thing.

Instead, he now watched almost transfixed as Hinata animatedly came up with their game plan for the start of the year, secretly wanting to see that grin on his face last forever. The two had prepared until they were blue in the face and couldn’t think of a single thing more to discuss. They had even commended each other for not feeling the least bit nervous about finally being in charge of the team they had worked so hard to take to the top.

In hindsight, that was probably what had jinxed them. They were already fumbling as soon as that last Friday morning began. The two couldn’t seem to manage their usual teamwork during the extra morning practice they always held for themselves. Hinata seemed even more clumsy and excitable than usual, and Kageyama was more on edge, taking out his anxieties by snapping at everyone throughout the day… especially his partner.

Now getting the gym prepared, he could practically smell the tension building around them. Already in the mood to argue, Tobio had no desire to back down when Hinata started in on him that afternoon, even for something as silly as it was.

“Oi! Kageyama! That’s my ball, dumbass!” he shouted, grabbing the volleyball Kageyama was holding and trying to rip it from the taller boy’s grasp.

Kageyama maintained his grip with no trouble. Hinata had a great deal of skill and fortitude and a remarkable amount of strength, but the fact that Kageyama easily out-sized the short, little Ace wasn’t something that was going to change anytime soon.

“Give it! This ball is at the perfect level of inflation! My hand feels great hitting it!” Hinata argued.

Kageyama hadn’t really noticed or cared until Hinata said something, but now it was clear that this was true, and he didn’t plan to just hand over a perfect ball to his rival…not even if his rival happened to be his biggest crush or looked as amazing in athletic shorts as this particular redhead. “Tch. You don’t own it, dumbass! Let go.”

It was amusing for him to watch Hinata struggle, and secretly something Kageyama had kind of come to enjoy putting him through. That unwavering, bold look of challenge he always received from Hinata felt worth whatever argument he had to suffer through to earn it.

“I had it first!” he called, jumping into the air to reach for the blue and yellow ball, as Kageyama held it far above his head.

This was the part that Kageyama lived for. This struggling between the two of them was always charged and exciting and tinged with a kind of tension that had initially frightened Tobio in their first year. Now, though, he almost _sought_ to start situations like this with Hinata…situations that would lead to them putting their hands all over each other, pulling at clothes, revealing slivers of pale skin that small, rough fingers brushed across.

It made him feel reprieve from the constant weight of his hidden feelings. It allowed him a few minutes to relieve a bit of his pent up frustrations innocently, while hoping Hinata never became any the wiser. He would almost rather die than be the first to admit to Hinata that he saw him as much more than a teammate or friend. He might have died anyway, if Hinata continued skimming his hands even on the places not covered by clothing.

Those hands on Kageyama's skin caused a feeling that could only be outdone by one other thing...Hinata's skin at the ends of Tobio's own fingertips.

This time something happened that caught Kageyama completely off-guard, and he wasn’t prepared for the reaction it caused. Hinata climbed Kageyama, stretching to reach the ball, locking his ankles at the small of the taller boy’s back. As Kageyama leaned backwards, arms stretched to their limit to keep the perfect volleyball away, Hinata continued holding onto Tobio’s waist with firm thighs wrapped tightly around him.

This struggling did a number on Kageyama’s insides. Still glaring at Hinata, he began to feel hot from fire starting somewhere deep within. As Hinata wriggled against his waist, reaching for the ball, their shirts rode up slightly, touching skin to skin. Tobio swallowed hard, but Hinata still hopped and struggled and rubbed… he was rubbing against him and Kageyama felt himself stir.

 _Oh my god! Not now!_ he thought frantically, but just as he was about to end things, the doors to the gym opened and the eyes of a very irritated Yamaguchi, a fairly unsurprised Tsukishima, and three confused first years were all plastered on the display.

“I’ll remind you that I did _not_ vote for this pair of idiots for captain,” came Tsukishima’s annoyed response to what they were seeing.

Though they were now frozen in place, Hinata’s weight still bared down against his pelvis. Kageyama felt a twitch again, and he was afraid. He was afraid because he just knew everyone would see what had happened…and he was afraid because he wasn’t sure if it was even him that had just gotten harder, or if it had been Hinata.

“Just take the stupid ball, dumbass!” he shouted, throwing it hard against the back wall and shoving Hinata off of him. Hinata fell with a loud thud to the gym floor. The two exchanged brief nervous glances, before he continued, “Let’s get this practice started! We don’t have time for your bullshit today!”

“Kageyama! Don’t be so vulgar right away in front of our new first years! You really have _no_ class, do you, you idiot!”

Snarling at the fire in his partner’s stare, Kageyama turned away for a moment to try and calm his mind. That look of challenge. It had definitely been on his face, and Tobio had _definitely_ felt something back there. It couldn’t have been what he thought it was, though. There was no way Hinata would have felt _that_ for _him_. His co-captain was always so open and honest about everything on his mind, surely Kageyama would have known by now if the other boy had any interest in him.

Still, he had felt _something_ , and there had been an extra glint behind those intense brown eyes. Hadn’t there?

Trying to push it far out of his mind, Kageyama continued the practice as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened. It actually went pretty well once they got through the introductions. All four of the third years were pleased with their new club recruits and thought this could shape up to be a great last year for everyone. The first years seemed excited to get started, as well, and the second years welcomed the chance to become senpai. It turned out to be a really enjoyable practice, and Kageyama had all but managed to forget about earlier.

Always the last to clear out of the gym and lock up, Kageyama sat drying his sweat-soaked hair in a chair by the wall. Towel resting atop his head, he took a swig of water before saying, “Hinata, if you need to get home, I can lock up.”

“Kageyama,” he barely heard, as he looked up to see Hinata halted, pulling on his club jacket slowly.

Staring back at him with confusion evident in his dark blue eyes, he listened as Hinata continued. “Earlier…” he directed the words over his shoulder, “when we were fighting, and we did that thing…”

Kageyama couldn’t help but tense up, expecting Hinata to call him out. He was certain this was the moment his world would end, if he didn't die first. His heart was pounding so rapidly and fiercely, he was a little surprised it wasn't visibly moving his shirt.

Instead, the orange-haired boy turned, that damnable intense look in his brown eyes. “That felt good, right?”

“Hi-Hinata,” he stuttered, struggling to find a response, certain the heat in his cheeks was visible in a blush. That wasn’t the response he had expected to hear. He should have had some answer prepared. Maybe he even had at some point, but now his mind was virtually blank. All he could do was wonder what Hinata meant exactly. What would happen after "That felt, good, right?"

He didn’t have much time for questions, though, because in two short strides, Hinata stood before him, so close that his shadow completely darkened the space around Kageyama. He wasn’t sure if he should feel discovered or intimidated or excited or anything at all, but again, Hinata gave little time for him to process, as he stood straddling Kageyama’s lap. Still gazing down at him curiously, Hinata’s lip twitched up for just a fraction of a second, and he lowered himself down against his volleyball partner, using the back of the chair for leverage.

“W-What are—“ Kageyama managed before he felt Hinata’s stiffness and knew for certain it wasn’t one-sided this time. “Hinata,” he huffed, cheeks fully pink, as his crush sat on his lap, eyes half-lidded, face so very close to his own. “Shit,” he groaned, abandoning his sports’ bottle on the floor.

The boy Kageyama had fallen for was pressing down into him, grinding his hardened dick against the rapidly rising bulge in his own shorts.

“ _Ah_ …Fuck.” It wasn’t fair. He hadn’t even confessed yet. He hadn’t even kissed Hinata, but here they were. Just like he always knew it would be, Hinata had all the power in this situation, and that’s exactly how Kageyama wanted it. He just hadn't known exactly how badly he wanted it...hadn't known how much he wanted to give Hinata permission to take him completely apart and put him back together the way he thought best.

Kageyama huffed out a shaky breath, as Hinata raised a knee into the chair and leaned forward, allowing him to press their hips together even harder. Their foreheads brushed gently together, until Hinata allowed it to rest there in order to stare into Kageyama's face. That look of need on Hinata's face was almost painfully beautiful. For the moment, Hinata was his and Kageyama wasn't sure he would survive that thought.

He had to stop dwelling on it, before he ruined everything. Kageyama couldn’t think of anything but the present. His hands slid around to Hinata’s backside, slipping beneath his underwear and grasping firmly at his smooth ass. He began helping his crush roll his hips against him slightly faster, creating more and more of that remarkable friction.

Momentarily he worried that might be too much for Hinata, until he watched his lips moan out his next words.

“Yeah. Don’t stop,” Hinata requested.

Kageyama had absolutely no intention of doing so. He would have done anything for Hinata in this moment—anything at all. He felt bewitched by those brown eyes that always seemed to stare right into him, especially now that they were so close.

Gripping Tobio’s hair even tighter, Hinata urged, “Kageyama, more skin…push them down.”

He was desperate to tell Hinata how fucking beautiful he looked right now. Instead he barely managed, “ _Ah_ —yeah. Okay.”

It felt like a dream as Kageyama pulled Hinata’s cock out and against him, feeling a little disappointed that it was almost impossible to really see from his angle. He was warm and heavy against the taught flesh of Kageyama's abdomen, and Kageyama suddenly seemed unable to stop his hands from trembling. Thoughts suddenly roared to life in his mind of all the things he wanted to do with Hinata--all the things he hoped one day Hinata would do to him.

Hinata croaked out a hoarse, “ _Ah_ ,” as he gripped tighter to the chair’s back. It began rocking slightly against the floor, as Hinata used it to help himself rub firmly against Kageyama. The sound of its creaking seemed deafening in the otherwise quiet club room.

“D-Dumbass, you’re not… _nnn_ …h-helping me… _shit_!” Tobio tried to scold as he struggled to get his own cock free of his shorts. It shouldn’t have been so difficult. He should have reprimanded Hinata more, but those thoughts were instantly shoved from his mind, once Hinata felt his cock rub directly against Kageyama’s.

“ _Unn_ …you feel so good…” Hinata moaned, hitching his ankles just above Kageyama’s knees, grinding down with even more pressure.

They were rubbing faster now, sweat beading between them where their foreheads touched. The sounds Hinata made and the warm string of precum pooling against Kageyama’s stomach were becoming way too much for him to bear.

“Fuck,” Kageyama muttered, squeezing his hand tightly against Hinata’s bare and perfect, rounded ass. “I’m gonna—“

“Me too,” Shouyou gasped. He could feel the tremors coursing through Hinata, and the sudden pressing weight of Hinata’s thighs against either side of his own, was almost too overwhelming. “ _Ahh_! K…Kageyama!”

Something hot spilled out onto Tobio’s abdomen, and that was the last he could take. He came hard right behind Hinata’s climax. His hands gripped tightly in the fabric of that familiar jacket, and his teeth were gritted together as he groaned out a long and strangled sob.

The two were panting heavily, minds all a jumble as they tried to make sense of the scene.

“I…” Kageyama started, looking down at their half undressed state, hands resting gently on Hinata’s back.

Sounding completely surprised, Hinata said, “Whoa. We just…” He was looking at the same thing, taking in the erotic sight of cum smeared between the two of them.

Both looking up at the same time, Kageyama realized where he was and what he had just done and exactly who he had just done it with. It was irresistible, and his hands flew up to cradle Hinata’s flushed cheeks, as he pulled him in powerfully for their first kiss.

It was better than every time Tobio had pictured tasting Hinata’s mouth. Having his partner clutch desperately at him, while he ran his tongue over those surprisingly soft lips, caused Kageyama to feel almost dizzier than his climax had. It was hot and a little salty and Hinata's familiar smell suddenly seemed to have a very distinct taste. An all enslaving taste that Kageyama knew he would seek again and again.

Feeling that softly curled orange hair in his fingers… The sound of Hinata’s quiet hum against his mouth… The faint smell of the gum chewed just after practice… The wet heat of their tongues sliding together… The weight of Hinata’s body still straddling his lap, leaning eagerly into him…

It was a moment that Tobio knew he couldn’t possibly ever forget, not even if he wanted to—not for a thousand lifetimes.

When they finally broke apart, the two of them stared at one another like they never had before. Kageyama honestly felt that he could die at that very moment, and it would be fine. There couldn’t possibly be a happier moment that waited for him than this.

“Kageyama,” Hinata started.

“Hmm?”

“I came first so I win!” Hinata laughed softly in Tobio’s face, before standing to readjust his shorts.

“What?! That’s not how it works!” he griped, using the towel around his neck to wipe his stomach clean. He should have known the moment wouldn’t last long. “Anyway, it was only by a few seconds…” he pouted, readjusting his own shorts.

Hinata laughed again before leaning down to place another tender kiss on his lips, pulling back to look at him with an expression that made Kageyama feel weak for him all over again.

Kageyama was so relieved. He felt that a great weight had been lifted from his chest now that he and Hinata had finally kissed…among other things. Things would surely be easier now that he would be able to once again breathe around his best friend, and he had never even needed to worry about how to convey that he’d been holding in these feelings for Hinata. It was more than he could have imagined.

…but just like that, Hinata took that relief and crumbled it to dust.

“Hey, Kageyama,” he started, in a voice that Tobio recognized meant he was wary of continuing. “Don’t…don’t tell anyone about this, you know?”

While Hinata shouldered his bag once more, Kageyama growled, “Why the hell would I tell anyone _that_?”

“I don’t know! You say weird stuff sometimes. You don’t always know when it’s appropriate to say certain things, and you know it.” Hinata didn’t even turn around to look at him.

He didn't know Hinata would be so embarrassed for people to find out. Hinata was the one that had made the first move, but now he sounded like he wanted to take it back. Hinata thought Kageyama was weird and awkward and inappropriate.

Kageyama knew he was all of those things, but Hinata had always been the one to make him feel like those things didn't matter.

“I know, but this is—“ _different_ , he wanted to say, but he was interrupted.

“This is something you don’t ever tell _anyone_. I mean, don’t even bring it up to me again, just to be safe. We can’t have people starting weird rumors. It won’t be good if everyone thinks you—”

Kageyama couldn’t believe what he was hearing, and so soon after everything. If everyone thinks what? If everyone thinks he's gay?

Kageyama _is_ gay. He thought if anybody could accept that about him, it would have been Hinata. He had never told Hinata outright, because he wasn't ready for Hinata to know that the person he was in love with was standing right in front of him. He had been afraid of rejection, but maybe he should have been afraid of this instead. Maybe he had misunderstood Hinata completely.

“Weird rumors? Hinata, we just—“

“I know! I know what we just did, but it didn’t mean anything! You don’t have to think of it like that, right?”

Tobio had never felt more crushed in his life. He had never known anything would hurt more than being abandoned on the court by his team. He should have known better. He should have known that his mile-a-minute friend had only seen the pleasure in front of him and hadn’t given a second thought to what consequences might follow later. _Of course_ , it hadn’t meant anything to Hinata. It wasn’t like he’d been the one harboring secret romantic feelings for his best friend for the last three years.

How was Kageyama ever supposed to tell him that it had meant _everything_ to him now?

“Yeah, I know. I _know_ it didn’t mean anything, dumbass! You don’t have to lecture me about it!” he shouted, desperate to keep the shaking out of his voice.

He was good enough to get Hinata off, but apparently not enough to actually care about. Kageyama knew he cared about him as a friend, but that wasn’t what he wanted. It wasn’t what he’d hoped for, and it certainly wasn’t what he expected after what had just happened between them.

“That’s— _yeah_ , I’m sorry. You definitely wouldn’t tell something like that. That was lame of me to feel all nervous about it, right? I just don’t want anyone getting the wrong idea about you and…” but the rest of explanation was lost, as Kageyama could hear nothing but his own thoughts echoing in his head.

If he were honest, in the moments after they had kissed, Kageyama was bursting with the urge to tell their closest friends that they had finally stopped beating around the bush. He knew that Yamaguchi would want to know, at least, since he was the one that had given Kageyama advice through the years on how to deal with all of those developing emotions.

He knew what Hinata’s reservations would be. It was something he’d played in his mind so many times when he imagined himself confessing. He could hear it now. Hinata didn’t want people to get the wrong idea that they were some kind of couple. They were both guys, and most people don’t understand that sort of thing. They would have to face assholes hurling insults at them, but that didn’t really bother Tobio. He wasn’t afraid to kick anyone’s ass who had something shitty to say.

He wasn’t the best at reading social cues, and maybe this was a much bigger deal for Hinata than Kageyama could even imagine, but that didn’t make him hurt any less right then. Kageyama would have been proud to tell anyone that he was with Hinata, if only he knew those feelings were mutual. People could say whatever the hell they wanted, as long as he could be with the one _he_ wanted.

Knowing now that the feelings weren’t mutual caused that weight in his chest to come back heavier than it had ever been.

“—yama? Hey, Tobio, are you okay?” Hinata’s voice managed to pierce through his swirling thoughts, and he looked up and met with concern in those big brown eyes. “Are you okay? You didn’t answer me.”

“I’m fine. What did you say?” he muttered dejectedly, returning his gaze to the floor.

“I asked if there was something else you wanted to say to me,” came a voice tinier than he had ever heard from Hinata.

“Yeah. I was going to say, I totally agree with you. This whole thing was just a big mistake.” An invisible force pressed hard on that weight, making his chest feel taut enough to break.

“I didn’t say—“ but Kageyama wasn’t in the mood to hear any apologetic, guilty excuses.

“Look, if you don’t want rumors to start, then maybe you shouldn’t choose a _guy_ the next time you feel like you need to get off!”

“That’s not what—“ Kageyama could see that Hinata looked upset, but why should he be? He was terrified someone might find out about them. He was embarrassed by Tobio. This was what Hinata had wanted anyway. He could at least have courtesy enough not to put up a fight while Kageyama let him off the hook.

“You were right. It felt good, but—“

“It felt great!” Hinata asserted, stepping back towards Kageyama.

“It felt _good_ , but it shouldn’t have happened at all. Use someone else next time you feel a dumbass urge like that.” His words tasted bitter on his tongue.

“I wasn’t usin—“ Hinata still tried to soften the blow. It wouldn’t have made a difference. No matter how nice he was about rejecting Kageyama, he was sure the ache in his chest would have been the same.

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to say anything else about it…and here. I changed my mind. You lock up tonight,” he huffed, chucking the keys at Hinata, who instinctively caught them without effort.

“Kageyama, wait a minute! Stop being so stubborn for a second! I think you’re misunders—“ His face was worried, but all Tobio could see was pity… pity that it was obvious Kageyama had wanted more from this. Pity that Kageyama had believed for a few minutes that Hinata actually felt something for him.

“Shut up, Hinata! I’m not misunderstanding shit. Don’t talk to me like I’m a moron all the time, ok? I get it just fine, but I don’t want to have to look at your face anymore tonight. I’ll see you on Monday,” he clipped, trying not to grit his teeth, before hurrying to exit the clubroom.

“Kageyama!” Hinata called after him, but he didn’t stop and Kageyama wouldn’t wait, knowing Hinata would be forced to slow a little to shut off the lights and lock the doors. He could manage at least a little head start before the lightning quick Hinata managed to catch up. Suddenly realizing he could never maintain the lead once Hinata made it to his bike, he ducked beside a row of hedges.

Even though his eyes were closed, the whole world was spinning. The ground seemed to quake beneath his feet. Kageyama struggled to get his breathing under control, before Hinata came past and heard the gasping inhales.

In no time, he heard his name being shouted in the distance. He didn’t want to face any more excuses that evening. He felt that if he could just make it to Monday, he could sort this whole thing out and be back to pretending Hinata didn’t make his heart flutter every time he walked in the room.

Pressing his hands hard against his ears in an effort to drown out his friend calling to him, he crouched even lower to the ground, his forehead creased with embarrassment and the pain of rejection.

“Kageyama! Where are you? Kageyama! That isn’t how I meant it, at all! Please just wait a minute!”

His hands flew from his ears to his mouth, both clamping down to keep his hurt from escaping in a noisy sob. Squeezing his eyes shut and praying he wouldn’t have to suffer the even greater humiliation of Hinata discovering him hiding behind some bushes, he missed the look of hurt that also marked Hinata’s face. The smaller boy scanned the schoolyard frantically, as he wiped frustrated tears away with the sleeve of his Volleyball Club jacket, before hurrying onward, still calling out for Tobio in the dark.

 

 

**_To Be Continued…_ **

 


	2. Surviving His Misunderstanding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Trying to convey that, however, had gone completely wrong. Tobio misunderstood him completely, and the way Hinata had phrased things didn’t really help matters. If there had ever been a time to find the right words for a situation, that had been it, and he had blown it. He knew he had come across much too harshly, overcompensating for the anxiety of trying to protect Kageyama from harm and hatefulness."

**  
**Of course.  
  
_Of course_ , they’d had their first relationship-type fight immediately after their first kiss. It was Kageyama, after all.  
  
Hinata was worried. At first, he’d been upset that Kageyama obviously hadn’t been listening to him. He had clearly missed the point entirely. Then he’d been angry at being ignored over this, but now it had been a full week of Kageyama not mumbling a single word to him, so he was getting extremely concerned.  
  
They always managed to fight like this…to misunderstand one another and end up completely at odds. Hinata sometimes wished Kageyama could just listen for once, instead of getting upset to the point of effectively checking out of the conversation. It was difficult for Hinata to understand, because he was the type of person who would rather talk about every detail and sort everything out right at the start, but Kageyama was the type to shut down when he felt too confused or hurt or threatened.  
  
Kageyama got under Hinata’s skin more than any other person he had ever met. He annoyed him and pushed him and challenged him to be greater. He provoked him and impressed him; antagonized him and thrilled him. It was exactly those reasons that Shouyou never stopped thinking about him.  
  
It started with him thinking, “Why is he so mean?” and “How can I be a player as good as he is?” until slowly it became, “Why can’t he see how incredible he is?” As Tobio opened up to him more, Hinata’s inner thoughts took a turn someplace he hadn’t expected.  
  
“All the girls fawn over him, but he doesn’t even look twice at any of them! Doesn't he know how good-looking he is?”  
  
“Why can’t I look away from him when he’s on the court…even when he’s just standing there with his hand on his hip and a scowl on his face?”  
  
“Were his eyes always that shade of blue?”  
  
“Why does he always insist on sitting next to me on the bus, and how can he smell _so good_ after a match?”  
  
“Would it really be so bad if I kissed him, just once?”  
  
That thought had come nearly every day over their second year in high school. At first, Hinata had done everything to fight against such a ridiculous thought. They were both boys, and he probably shouldn't have been thinking things like that about his best friend. After awhile, Hinata realized there was just no controlling what he felt for Kageyama. It had grown far beyond anything he'd ever felt for another person in his life.  
  
It tore at him not to be able to just come right out and confess, as he watched other friends do that very thing. People were always asking him why he didn't have a girlfriend or why he never accepted confessions. He was becoming more skilled at coming up with bullshit answers for that question, but less and less skilled at keeping his gaze from lingering on his partner during his response.  
  
Sometimes, though, it seemed Kageyama was listening carefully for his answers, even when he shouldn't have been concerned. Every now and then, when it was just the two of them, Hinata couldn’t shake the feeling that Kageyama was having that exact same ideas. He would have this hungry look in his dark blue eyes, and Hinata would feel his insides twisting, while reminding himself _not_ to get on his toes and take Tobio’s face in his hands.  
  
However, any time Hinata imagined Kageyama wanted something more between them, the genius setter somehow always managed to instantly cover those tracks until Hinata assumed, instead, he was the one who was crazy. He thought maybe it was just that he had simply wanted it to be true too badly.  
  
Then he just _had_ to go and start that stupid fight over the volleyball. It’s not like the argument itself was unusual for the two of them. It happened all the time. Even jumping on Kageyama and climbing all over him wasn’t new, but somehow he’d been wriggling in just the right place that time to stimulate a reaction he didn’t expect.  
  
Reaching for the ball, as he tried to hold onto Kageyama with his legs, he suddenly realized that Tobio was getting hard. Pausing immediately when the door flew open, Hinata tried desperately to will himself not to act, but it was no good.  
  
His hips had been grinding against Kageyama and it had felt nice enough that it had turned his crush on and _oh god_ maybe this was the day Hinata could finally say something. Even without moving again, he started becoming erect. He feared overheating his face would betray the terror of being discovered this way.  
  
When Tobio shoved him to the floor, Hinata couldn’t stop staring up at him, trying somehow to convey that everything was alright…that he didn’t need to be embarrassed... that Hinata most _definitely_ felt that arousal towards his setter.  
  
Surprised that the practice had still turned out so well, Hinata felt like maybe it was a sign that he should take that first leap with Kageyama. He thought he might actually evaporate, as he began to speak to his friend in the club room. When he had lowered himself onto Tobio’s lap and watched him almost immediately give way to desire, it only made his own need greater.  
  
Once Kageyama had them skin to skin, Hinata could only focus on the pleasure. Every touch seemed amplified. Kageyama’s hands cupping around his rear was a sensation he never realized would feel so perfect. Their cocks sliding together, Tobio not even flinching as his abdomen became covered in precum, was nearly enough to drive Shouyou mad. Even the way Kageyama's forehead felt barely resting against his own made him shudder with anticipation.  
  
When they came just from brief grinding, he could hardly believe it. Especially hard to believe was that it had happened with the one person he’d spent the years imagining would be with him. Looking up to see it was, in fact, still Tobio staring back at him and having them both diving forward for a kiss…it was more than Hinata had ever believed would actually happen.  
  
Kageyama following his directions, becoming absolute putty in Hinata’s hands, doing exactly what was asked of him for a change? It was addictive. He knew there was no way he would be able to keep to himself now.  
  
Afterwards, though, once his euphoria started to clear, Hinata had a terrifying thought. What if Kageyama said something to the wrong person?  
  
Kageyama never thought about those kinds of things. If he wanted to tell people about Hinata and him, he would do exactly that, not thinking about what kind of problems that might create. It probably wouldn’t cross his mind that they may not only be ostracized, but lose members of the team, find themselves the center of bullying at school and at matches, and depending on what their principal and other teammates’ parents' thoughts were on the matter, they may even be pressured to give up their captains’ positions.  
  
He would never allow that to happen, especially not to Kageyama. He wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he was the reason Kageyama ended up bullied. Tobio might have been bigger and ruder on the outside, but Hinata knew that people’s cruel words hurt him just as much as anyone else. He couldn’t shake the urge to protect Kageyama from those things.  
  
Trying to convey that, however, had gone completely wrong. Tobio misunderstood him completely, and the way Hinata had phrased things didn’t really help matters. If there had ever been a time to find the right words for a situation, that had been it, and he had blown it. He knew he had come across much too harshly, overcompensating for the anxiety of trying to protect Kageyama from harm and hatefulness.  
  
They needed to have more time to discuss things before they went forward. They needed to come up with a way to be together that was safe. It wouldn’t make a difference to Kageyama that Hinata was a boy. Hinata knew he might have to explain why it would be more difficult for others to accept than if he had been boasting about being with a girl.  
  
Kageyama wasn’t stupid, but his understanding of social rules was still terribly lacking, even though it was much better than when the two had first met. Hinata recalled having to explain high fives during their first year on the volleyball team.  
  
By the time he was done trying to back-pedal and explain to Kageyama he hadn’t meant that them being together was a mistake, it was too late. He realized by the angry, glazed over stare that Tobio hadn’t been listening. The fact that it took several attempts of calling his name to gain his attention only proved that further.  
  
In trying to proactively keep Kageyama from harm, Hinata had managed to be the one to hurt him most. He was so furious with himself for not handling things better, that he couldn’t keep the tears from stinging his eyes that night. If he could just get Tobio to listen, he could explain, but Tobio was nowhere to be found.  
  
That Friday night, Hinata had called him repeatedly and gone all the way to his house to look for him, but no one had been home. He spent the weekend leaving messages, which he was certain Kageyama would delete without hearing, and showing up to his house to try to talk. Kageyama’s father turned him away each time, finally telling Shouyou to just wait until school on Monday.  
  
That was no good either. Hinata still had the key to the gym and showed up for their daily extra practice each morning to find himself completely alone. This was bad. Not once in all their time at Karasuno had Kageyama missed these morning practices. He had even tried to come when he had the flu.  
  
Hinata would spend time sulking, before slamming several balls at the wall with great force, imagining when he finally got the chance to tell Tobio off for being such a baby about this thing...especially when it was just as much his fault for not talking. Then he would head to his classes, hoping maybe the teacher would have some errand they could run together.  
  
Kageyama was surprisingly adept at finding ways to avoid Hinata, always making sure there were other people around if Hinata was near. Suddenly, Kageyama had a group of new friends he refused to be without, spending every spare moment between classes and at lunch surrounded by them, offering no opportunity for Hinata to bring up what needed to be said… not reacting at all to the irritated glares Shouyou shot in his direction.  
  
During practices in the afternoon, anything that needed to be said to Hinata, Kageyama would direct at Yamaguchi or Tsukishima.  
  
“He needs to be careful not to let his arm waver so much during the blocks.”  
  
“I think it’s better for the team, if we work on something other than quicks.”  
  
He seemed very careful not to say anything rude that would normally have Hinata arguing back, so no one commented, but the whole team noticed that he seemed to be intentionally avoiding speaking with his co-captain.  
  
When it started affecting their teamwork on the court more and more, Tsukishima and Yamaguchi had tried to intervene. Hinata chose simply to avoid answering, but Kageyama told them very succinctly and very rudely to, “Mind your own fucking business.”  
  
Come that following Friday, after exhausting every other resource he could think of, Hinata resorted to having Yamaguchi tell Tobio that Coach had something for him. He instructed Kageyama to go to the stands that surrounded their school’s track arena.  
  
When Kageyama made it to the bleachers, he rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, but he still walked slowly up the stands, heavy steps echoing against the metal under his feet.  
  
Sitting on the seat below Hinata, he groaned, “I knew it. I knew Yamaguchi set me up.”  
  
Sighing heavily, Hinata quickly prayed this didn’t turn out as disastrous as the last time. Before they could move forward, he needed to know exactly what Kageyama wanted between them. As far as Hinata knew, maybe fooling around was it… but he didn’t really believe that was the case. He wouldn't have been so angry if getting off had been his only goal. If Tobio wasn’t going to confess like a normal person, then Hinata would have to take a completely different approach.  
  
He had a feeling he knew the real reason Kageyama was upset, but he just wanted to hear him say it. Kageyama had missed completely that Hinata was afraid of what it would do to him, if rumors about them started. He hadn’t listened or asked about why Hinata didn’t want him to go through that.  
  
All Kageyama had heard was that kissing him had been a mistake…touching him had been a mistake…that Hinata was embarrassed to be seen with him.  
  
It didn’t matter that Hinata hadn’t meant it that way. That’s how the words had sounded to Tobio. No matter how hard he worked, and he really did work hard, Kageyama was afraid that he would always be that unlikable King.  
  
Hinata knew, if Tobio felt about him the way he felt about Tobio, then the person he would be most afraid would grow tired and abandon him would be Hinata himself.  
  
If Shouyou could just get him to admit to that, he would make certain never to stop telling Tobio that there wasn’t a chance of him leaving. He would tell him that he was a stubborn idiot, if he really believed Hinata would discard him after everything they’d been through. He would tell Tobio he hadn’t even seen how much Shouyou loved him yet, and that he, at least, owed him the faith to give it a try.  
  
Tearing him out of his thoughts, Kageyama snipped, “What do you want? I told you to just let me sort it out myself.”  
  
Hinata cringed. Clearly this was off to a “wonderful” start.  
  
“If I let you do that, we’re going to lose all the first years! What kind of example do you think we’ve set this week?”  
  
“It’s fine. Don’t worry so much.” It was actually a softer response, one that gave Hinata a small fleeting feeling of hope.  
  
“Here. I brought something I thought you might like. You know…like an apology?” He pulled some plastic disc cases from his backpack. He tried to hand them to Kageyama, who looked at them, then at him, but just kept his arms crossed, face stuck in that familiar scowl.  
  
“They’re discs of the current teams in Miyagi practicing. Takeda Sensei brought them by this morning. He just asked the coaches and exchanged.”  
  
Hinata swore he saw a brief excited flash in those dark blue eyes, but it was gone quickly as Kageyama turned away, looking back out over the track field. “I don’t need them. You can review them.”  
  
“But you love these things! I’m not as good at that kind of stuff. I thought maybe I’d come over this weekend and we could watch together,” Hinata said expectantly, as he leaned down and tried to get Kageyama’s attention.  
  
Shouyou thought he might actually have swayed him, when Tobio didn’t immediately turn away, but that wasn’t the case.  
  
“It’s fine. Just keep them at your place.”  
  
“You can come watch them at my place.”  
  
“My parents are going on a hot springs weekend. I have to stay home and watch the house,” he responded blandly.  
  
The excuses seemed to easily pour from Kageyama’s mouth.  
  
“Just take them and stop being so pissy about everything,” he ordered, patience growing thin. It had no more effect on Kageyama than any of his other attempts had.  
  
Softly, he tried, “I’m sorry for what happened. I shouldn’t have made a move like that without talking to you about it first.”  
  
“You think that’s what I’m mad about? You think I’m mad that we… you know?”  
__  
No, but you won’t really talk to me, Hinata thought.  
  
“Isn’t it?”  
  
_Come on, Tobio. Just say it!_ he thought again. He was getting a headache trying to will the confession out of Kageyama.  
  
“No. Now leave me alone, idiot. I’ll get my shit together for next week. Everything will be back to normal, so don’t freak out,” he still looked angry, but at least he was looking at Hinata, which was better than nothing.  
  
“Well… just take the discs then,” Hinata tried, placing them on Kageyama’s lap.  
  
“I don’t want the fucking discs!” he shouted, shoving them hard against Hinata’s chest.  
  
Hinata knew his setter was stubborn, but he was starting to lose heart this evening. “Then what, Kageyama? You’re being ridiculous. I’m listening here. _What do you want_?!”  
  
“What do I want? What do _**I**_ —?” he huffed, but his question was cut short by his decision.  
  
He pressed his hands against the bleacher bench on either side of Hinata, propelling himself upward, until his lips were crushing against Hinata's. Immediately, one of Kageyama’s hands came off the bench to tangle in orange hair, pulling Hinata even closer.  
  
This was different than their first kiss. It was desperate and impatient and searching for some kind of sign. Kageyama whimpered quietly against Hinata’s lips; a sound that reduced Hinata to jelly.  
  
Slipping off the bench to the foot rest below, he put his arms around Kageyama’s shoulders, leaning into him further. The sounds of plastic cases rattling as they fell against metal bleachers barely registered.  
  
Kageyama was all keyed up. Hinata could tell by the way his hand trembled against the side of his neck. Shouyou’s skin burned from within, just from that light, quavering touch of Kageyama’s hand. He couldn’t imagine how he would survive, if they were somewhere more private.  
  
_Please don’t push me away again_ , he thought.  
  
Suddenly, Hinata felt something wet and hot dripping down his cheek. So, it was Shouyou who pulled away quickly, knowing he had just tasted the salt of Tobio’s tears. Looking back at him, stunned at what he was seeing, Hinata felt frozen on that bleacher. He meant to say something. He meant to say _anything_ , but the sight of Tobio with tears in his eyes was so out of place, this didn’t even feel like reality at the moment.  
  
Kageyama hadn’t even registered that he was crying, until he saw wetness smeared on Hinata’s cheeks. The heels of his hands flew up to his own cheeks to confirm what he was afraid he was seeing.  
  
“Damn it!” he cursed, looking completely mortified.  
  
He stood abruptly and turned, while Hinata reached out rapidly to grasp his uniform sleeve. Kageyama threw off the grip harshly and hurried down the bleachers and out of sight.  
  
“Kageyama!” he shouted after him, the same as he had last week.  
  
“Shut up, dumbass! Don’t you dare say _anything_!” came the reply, fading into the distance.  
  
Still slightly dumbfounded, Hinata wiped off the wetness on his cheek and stared at it shining on his fingers. Kissing Hinata had been so important to him, that it had managed to reduce Kageyama to tears. He may not have convinced Tobio to say it with words, but Hinata had still gotten the message loud and clear.  
  
He couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear, before standing and grabbing his things. He barely noticed that he somehow made it down the bleachers in two long jumps, in an effort to go after him again.  
  
Hinata would go after Kageyama as many times as it took. Shouyou was completely elated, feeling like he might be able to fly. If he needed to reassure Kageyama every day of his life, he would. Now that he knew how the other boy felt, nothing would keep him from that.  
  
“I knew it, you stubborn idiot.”  
  
**__  
To Be Continued…**


	3. Surviving His Skin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Hinata grinned and settled back down onto Kageyama’s chest, wrapping one of his legs completely across, as Tobio pulled up his thick blanket to cover the two of them snuggly.
> 
> “So, what now?” Kageyama asked.
> 
> “What do you want to do now?”
> 
> “I—I just want to be with you, Hinata.”"

**SURVIVING HIS SKIN:  
  
** Pulling on a white KVBC t-shirt after his evening shower, knowing no one else was home to hear him, Kageyama groaned loudly and kicked at the foot of his bed. He’d really done it now. There was no way he would be able to avoid confessing properly after what had happened earlier in the afternoon. He had all but done so already. He’d never felt so anxious about anything in his life, and he couldn’t stop picturing Hinata laughing at him for being too invested in this whole thing.  
  
_Bakageyama! It’s not that big a deal! Stop being so creepy and serious.  
_  
It was easy for him to imagine Shouyou saying something like that, but to him this was serious. He was very serious about his feelings for the other boy, and he was scared that it might not be a big deal to his easy-going friend.  
  
Opening the drawer that held his pajama bottoms, he reached for his favorite pair and paused after bringing them out. Kageyama wanted to laugh. They were a pair that had been gifted to him… red and black, like Japan’s national team, with a Mikasa volleyball printed on the front, near the pocket.  
  
He’d received them two birthdays ago…from the only person ever to refer to him as “best friend.” They were his favorites not because they were any more comfortable than the others, but precisely because they were a gift from Hinata. The idea that someone spent real time thinking about a gift that would make him happy, and that it also happened to be the boy he liked, made those dumb pajama pants all the more special.  
  
It was only fitting that he had grabbed those in the middle of this whole thing. He’d avoided them all week, but now he just pulled them out instinctively. Putting them on and sitting at the foot of his bed, he thought about the time he’d received that perfect present.  
  
He smiled at the memory of an unusually quiet Hinata, waiting nervously as Kageyama had opened the packaging. It hadn’t been the only item in the box. There were other pieces of official merchandise for the national team, but the soft material of the bottoms made him pull those out first. He hadn’t known what to say, sitting on his front stoop, on that cold December evening. He just sat staring at the contents of the box, fingering the red and black fabric in his hands.  
  
Hinata’s face had fallen slightly waiting to hear Kageyama’s response.  
  
“It’s too much, right? I couldn’t decide which one was the coolest, so I kind of got carried away. It’s okay if you don’t want it. I mean, I guess it _is_ kind of weird…” Hinata’s voice quavered anxiously and he had yet to take a breath.  
  
Looking up rapidly, Kageyama’s natural scowl made Hinata flinch, until he interrupted with, “No. I don’t think it’s weird. I think it’s awesome! The stuff is _really_ cool!”  
  
He could see the relief pouring over Hinata’s whole person. “It _is_ really cool, right?!”  
  
“Is this really all for me?” When Hinata nodded, Kageyama frowned, “but I only bought you an ice cream on your birthday.”  
  
“So? That was six months ago. We know each other even better now.” Staring up at him, Hinata seemed to sparkle and shine as he affirmed, “We weren’t best friends, yet.”  
  
“Best frie--?” Kageyama had to turn his head to hide the red dusting his cheeks.  
  
“We…we are best friends, aren’t we, Kageyama?”  
  
It would have been impossible for him to deny that expectant face. In hindsight, seeing Hinata with such a look of fret hoping his words would be confirmed…it was probably the first moment some deeper feeling stirred for his friend.  
  
Still blushing in the dark, he declared, “Of course, we are, dumbass. You’re my best friend, so don’t forget it.”  
  
Hinata pulled his knees up to his chest and rested his cheek on them. Smiling broadly, he muttered, “Happy Birthday, stupid,” ducking when Kageyama reached to grab the top of his head.  
  
That had been the winter of their first year. Now at the start of year three, Tobio was hopelessly in love with that broad smile.  
  
He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to say when he faced Hinata again. On one hand, he thought maybe it would be better to just say it, but on the other, he hoped to prolong that as long as possible. He was kind of surprised that he had gotten this far into the evening without so much as a peep from Shouyou.  
  
Just as he was hoping he might actually have time to find the right words to tell his best friend that he wanted to be with him, Kageyama’s phone chimed. There was a text from Hinata that read, “ _Open the front door, please_.”  
  
He took a couple of deep breaths, and nervously checked his appearance in the mirror.  
  
“What the hell are you doing, dumbass?” he asked himself out loud, only furthering his embarrassment over the whole situation.  
  
Heading to the front door, he took a look through the peephole. Hinata was standing there, a bag on his shoulder, wearing comfortable clothing, and somehow managing to look more attractive than ever. His hair seemed even more soft and fluffy than usual, and it was obvious that it had been recently showered. Tobio’s stomach was already fluttering anxiously, yearning to run his hands through those orange curls.  
  
“What do you want, Hinata?” he questioned gruffly through the door.  
  
He watched his friend scrunch up his face and roll his eyes, before he insisted, “Don’t act stupid. Just let me inside.”  
  
Kageyama didn’t respond. He was only avoiding the inevitable at this point, but he was curious to see what Hinata was willing to do.  
  
Turning slightly pink, Shouyou threatened in a low growl, “Kaaageeeyaaamaaa, you have thirty seconds to open this door before I get loud enough to disturb your neighbors!”  
  
Looking like he was debating something extremely serious, Hinata took a deep breath and held it for a second. Then he scrunched up his face even tighter, demanding, “Now open up and stop acting like a _shit_ head!”  
  
_Shit? Too cute!_ Kageyama snorted quietly to himself, watching as Hinata had basically choked on the curse word.  
  
He opened the door and leaned against its frame with his arms crossed, as he asked, “Did you just call me a shithead?”  
  
“ _No_! Don’t say it again. _Gaah_!” The way he denied something so obviously true and looked so flustered by words that Kageyama never thought twice about—it warmed Kageyama from somewhere deep inside, making him feel a little more confident and certain about the things that needed to be said.  
  
Hinata looked almost sheepish, as he asked, “Just…can I come in? Please?”  
  
Standing aside, Kageyama gestured for him to enter and then closed the door behind them. He padded over to lean against the arm of the sofa and waited for Hinata to remove his shoes.  
  
“Why are you here, Hinata? What is it that you are expecting from this?”  
  
“Your parents are gone?” he questioned, glancing timidly around for signs of them. The shyness looked out of place on the Shouyou he was familiar with, and he found himself suppressing a smile.  
  
“I told you they would be earlier,” he reminded.  
  
“I told my mom I was sleeping over.” Just like that, the boldness was back in that stare and Kageyama felt a lump in his throat at the implication that they would be spending the night alone together… especially after what had already happened between them.  
  
Hinata continued, “You’re not getting out of this. I’ve got all night, so stop sulking and beating around the bush and acting like nothing is different. Do you have something you want to say to me or not?”  
  
Kageyama tried hard to swallow down that lump in his throat and prayed whatever words came out didn’t sound completely lame.  
  
“I guess— I kind of like you.” _Damn it._  
  
Huffing out a deeply annoyed sigh, Hinata rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. He offered Kageyama a reprimanding glare, eyebrow raised for emphasis. “I like you, too. Did you need to make that _so_ painful?”  
  
Kageyama stood straight and tall, before slouching again, while nervously pacing the floor and grumbling, “You don’t get it. It’s worse than that. It’s not just that I think you’re attractive or that the idea of touching you makes me so excited it feels like I’ll pass out. It’s way worse than ‘I kind of like you.’”  
  
“What do you mean?” asked Hinata, face relaxing from irritation to tender concern.  
  
Without doing anymore thinking, Tobio stopped against the sofa once more and just let the words pour out where they may.  
  
“I want to _be_ with you. I want you to be my boyfriend, and I don’t want anyone else to have you. I want to know when you’re sad, so I can make you happy again. I-I want it to be okay with you that I spend all my extra time thinking about you. I’ve really given this a lot of thought, and I… I’m pretty sure I…I’m i-in…Hinata, I think I love you.”  
  
Kageyama had rushed out the phrase so quickly, he was surprised the other boy had even known what he said. It was clear by the way Shouyou was gawking at him, with brown eyes like saucers that he definitely had heard. Hinata’s mouth opened and closed a few times, never breaking their gaze, but never managing to find whatever response he was looking for either. He looked utterly stunned, and Kageyama was beginning to lose whatever nerve he had left.  
  
“See?! I told you. It’s terrible,” he muttered, turning his head to the side and begging whatever god might be listening _not_ to let him tear up.  
  
This was too humiliating. How were they going to go on with volleyball like this never happened? Kageyama silently cursed himself for ruining everything.  
  
“It _is_ terrible,” Hinata responded, eyes cast towards the ground, but his voice wasn’t angry or disgusted. He took a step that had him standing so very close to Kageyama, and it made the taller boy hold his breath. The way he could see Hinata trembling slightly made him think maybe he hadn’t ruined anything.  
  
Looking up to meet his gaze, big brown eyes full of some strange mix of remorse and relief, Hinata said, “We’ve both wasted so much time already.”  
  
Then Hinata’s face was pressed against the cotton covering Kageyama’s chest, his breath warm through the fabric, and his arms slid around to pull himself tightly against Tobio.  
  
“Really?” Kageyama heard himself asking, though the voice was so astonished it didn’t even feel like his own. He felt genuinely surprised that Hinata could have the kind of feelings he had, but for someone stern and closed-off like Tobio.  
  
“Really,” Hinata answered easily, face still against Kageyama’s firm chest, taking a deep, shuddering breath that made Tobio want to kiss him immediately. Instead, he let Hinata continue. “I like you that way, too. I’ve loved you for ages, you big idiot.”  
  
Kageyama could practically hear Hinata’s grin in his voice. Finally putting his arms around his partner and nuzzling against that mess of orange hair, he half-heartedly scolded, “Don’t call me an idiot. You didn’t know how I felt either, dumbass.”  
  
“Yeah, but I figured it out before you did, so I win again.”  
  
Kageyama was so relieved to hear that frustrating little antagonist still trying to provoke him. He didn’t want that part of them to change. He looked forward to their stupid tiffs. So, he couldn’t help the short, breathy laugh he let out, before saying, “Shut up, stupid,” and pulling Hinata even tighter in his embrace.  
  
They stood in his living room like that for a while before Hinata broke their silence.  
  
“Kageyama…” he began, looking up anxiously. “Could I…um…could I try kissing you?”  
  
_So fucking cute_ Tobio thought.  
  
Hinata looked almost timid, and Kageyama wanted to put him at ease. “Why are you asking, weirdo? We’ve already kissed.”  
  
“Yeah, but those were both heat of the moment and I just—well, I really wanted…” he paused and stood up tall and bold, still careful to stay in Kageyama’s arms. “I want to kiss you ‘til our lips are sore!” he practically shouted, throwing both hands over his embarrassed face. Even that wasn’t enough. Kageyama could see the bright red that had taken over his fair skin, extending all the way to the tips of his ears.  
  
Tobio also felt the red flush in his own cheeks, but ran his fingers affectionately over the smooth gray fabric covering Hinata’s back.  
  
“You really are dumb,” he mumbled bashfully.  
  
Putting his hands on Kageyama’s shoulders and rising to the tips of his toes, Hinata asked, “So…yes, then?”  
  
All Kageyama could do was nod slightly, but it was all that was needed. Hinata smiled ecstatically, and the two leaned in to close the remaining space between them.  
  
Something about the way Shouyou had to stretch to reach his lips made Kageyama want even more of him. He lifted him just slightly, helping support his strained calves, and held him firmly while their lips brushed feather light against one another.  
  
The softness of Shouyou’s mouth was overwhelming. Kageyama hadn’t really had a chance to notice during their previous two heated kisses, but he certainly did now, and that alone made him light-headed.  
  
The whole moment was unbelievable. He was standing in his living room holding onto the boy that had taken over his whole world. He was kissing Hinata. _No_. Hinata was kissing him because he wanted to—because he loved Kageyama the same way Kageyama loved him.  
  
Tobio sucked in a sharp breath at the thought and laughed softly against Hinata’s eager lips.  
  
“What’s so funny?” Hinata questioned.  
  
Shaking his head, Kageyama said, “Nothing. This just feels so right… and you feel so good. Isn't that really stupid?”  
  
Grinning again, Hinata responded, “Very,” before shoving Kageyama backwards hard, toppling the two of them over the arm of the sofa and onto its cushions.  
  
The force of Hinata landing on his chest pushed a grunt from Kageyama’s lungs, and the two of them laughed awkwardly.  
  
“Come over here,” Kageyama demanded, dragging Hinata further up the length of him with hands clutched in the fabric of his shirt. Kageyama wasn’t sure which of them managed to get there first. All he knew was the sweet, warm pleasure of their lips and tongues tangling together again.  
  
They laid on the couch, savoring the way the wet heat of gliding tongues lit every nerve-ending on fire. Kageyama could hear Hinata’s breathing getting heavier. He could feel him trembling harder the more worked up he became, and Kageyama was almost certain Hinata could feel the rapid thrum of his pulse as Hinata sucked hard against his neck.  
  
Gasping sharply at the sensation of Hinata marking him, Kageyama almost missed noticing how hard Hinata had become, before Hinata rapidly lifted his hips away in an effort to conceal his readiness. Knowing he was the cause of getting Hinata that worked up shivered its way excitedly down Kageyama’s spine, pulling a taut feeling low in his abdomen as Kageyama grew harder himself.  
  
Slinking his hands to Hinata’s hips and holding them in place, Kageyama ground up against Hinata.  
  
“K-Kage…” he started, before changing his mind; a quivering voice breathing out, “Tobio.”  
  
“I love you, Shouyou,” he exhaled, confident and certain and not feeling an ounce of embarrassment for once.  
  
“I love you, too,” Hinata whimpered against Kageyama’s throat. “-And I want you. I want you _so_ badly,” he finished before sucking again at that same spot on Tobio’s neck hard enough to leave a mark, sending blinding, white-hot sensation to prickle its way swiftly through all of his senses.  
  
“Fuck, _yes_. Come to my room?” he asked hopefully.  
  
“Mm,” Hinata hummed, nodding with the lobe of Kageyama’s ear now drawn between his teeth.  
  
“Shit. You’re gonna kill me like this,” Tobio whined, pushing him off and stumbling to his feet.  
  
“Good,” Hinata mewed mischievously, before Kageyama stooped low and pulled the impish boy onto his back.  
  
He didn’t know how he managed to make it to his bed with Hinata pulling off shirts and nibbling a heated trail from his earlobe down between his shoulder blades, all while he could feel Hinata’s erection pressed against the small of his back where Hinata’s hips rested.  
  
Leaning back slightly, he dropped Shouyou onto his mattress, where Hinata quickly sat up and pushed those precious gifted pajama pants off Kageyama’s hips and onto the floor.  
  
“Take my pants off, Tobio,” Hinata ordered, leaning back on his elbows.  
  
Kageyama wasted no time following directions and had the shorts tossed on the floor in seconds.  
  
Hovering over Hinata’s body for another kiss, the heat radiating between their bare chests was almost too much. Kageyama couldn’t stop himself from staring. The long fingers of his right hand ran tenderly across Hinata’s cheekbones, which curled Hinata’s lips into an adoring smile.  
  
Shouyou looked magnificent laying on Tobio’s sheets, his orange waves haloing his head, brown eyes glittering and blinking slowly up at Kageyama. His own adoration evident on his lips, Kageyama traced his fingers down the line of Hinata’s neck, over his defined shoulders and arms from years of volleyball training, down his smooth chest and lightly defined abs. Kageyama couldn’t help the extra time he spent running those fingers up and down that torso that he had yearned to touch for so long now. Hinata felt better than Kageyama had ever dreamed he might.  
  
After a long relaxing inhale, a ticklish spot made Hinata’s abdominals jump. He tilted his head and placed one of his palms to Kageyama’s cheeks.  
  
“What are you doing?” he asked.  
  
“You’re so beautiful, Shouyou,” he remarked, expression still admiring, though Hinata became embarrassed and tried to look away to hide the pink flush. Kageyama gently guided his face back towards him as he admitted, “I’ve almost blurted that out so many times, but now I can tell you and it’s all right. To me, you’re just— you’re so damn stunning.”  
  
Hinata let out a quiet, embarrassed laugh before asking, “ _Me_?! What about you?! Have you ever _seen_ yourself without your shirt?” Both of his hands were gripping tightly at Tobio’s waist. “Do you have _any_ idea how many times I’ve been distracted by this stupid v-cut in your hips? Or your unfairly perfect ass?” Hinata’s fingers taunted just beneath the leg opening of Kageyama’s briefs, squeezing the firm muscle beneath, dragging a heady moan out from Kageyama’s lungs.  
  
“ _Unfair_?” Tobio gasped. “You’re the one who’s unfair. Your shorts are always too big,” he whimpered, “always riding way too low on your hips during games. How am I supposed to focus like that, dumbass?”  
  
One arm had snaked beneath Hinata and his hand had a firm grasp on the outstanding behind in question.  
  
“Your dumb flawless hair?” Hinata complained, tangling in it and using it to expose more of Kageyama’s throat, licking a stripe up his overly sensitive pulse line.  
  
“This wild, perfect mess?” Kageyama groaned, mimicking Hinata’s move, but sliding his tongue up behind his love’s ear before tugging it hungrily between his teeth.  
  
Hinata sucked air in with a sharp, loud hiss. “These shoulders,” he purred, gripping and clawing at the set of defined muscles.  
  
“ _Mmph_ …” Kageyama’s mind was fuzzy and he thought maybe this was what being drunk would feel like… if being drunk also caused precum to spill hot and thick from his cock.  
  
He ground down against Hinata’s erection through their underwear, and Hinata hummed a desperate, strangled noise before instinctively tilting his hips hard against Kageyama.  
  
From the thick noise it made, Kageyama thought Hinata’s swallowing sounded difficult. Two of Hinata’s fingers followed the line that trailed from just below Tobio’s bellybutton agonizingly slow until they slipped just inside the waistband of Kageyama’s briefs, before allowing the elastic to snap back in place with a light sting. “I—this line here…it gets me so distracted, I think about it when I’m all alone. Does—does that bother you, Tobio?”  
  
“Does what bother me?” Kageyama huffed with another grind against Hinata’s length, struggling to hold onto coherent thought.  
  
“That I can’t even remember how many times I’ve come while picturing how amazing you are?” he offered, still writhing hard beneath him.  
  
“ _Shit_!” Kageyama choked. “How can… _fucking hell_ , Shouyou…how could that possibly bother me when I’ve been… _ah_ …doing the same thing with you? _Fuck_!”  
  
Their lips were crashed together again. Tongues working over lips and teeth, inexperienced but oh-so-welcomed. Hips rolled in time with desire so frantic, it almost hurt.  
  
“I… _oh god_ …I really want to feel you again,” Hinata said pleadingly, thumbs hitched into the waistband of Kageyama’s briefs, tugging the fabric desperately and leaving raw heat where skin brushed skin.  
  
“T-take them off, Sh-Shou,” Kageyama stammered, his body now shivering hard enough that he felt he may come apart at the seams.  
  
“Hey,” Hinata called firmly, moving both hands to cup Kageyama’s face so he could look him straight in the eyes. It would have been clear to anyone, but Hinata asked anyway. “Are you nervous?”  
  
Kageyama considered bluffing, but his teeth were virtually chattering, so he nodded. If this went any further, they would be touching skin to skin, completely bare with one another, every inch that he’d imagined available to view or touch or _taste_. It was maddening. He was trying with all his might not to lose it…not to come off like he might not survive the feel of Hinata’s skin flush against his.  
  
“We can stop, you know?” Hinata said comfortingly, fingers running across Kageyama’s forehead, brushing long black strands away from his dark blue eyes. “If this is too fast for you, we can stop, Tobio. I can wait.” His familiar voice was patient and gentle and Kageyama’s lip twitched up slightly at the sight of Hinata trying hard to hold his hips still.  
  
Shaking his head fiercely and inhaling long and deep to steady himself, Kageyama threaded his fingers through the soft orange hair that he had so longed to touch. Leaning low and offering a honeyed-sweet kiss, he rolled his hips hard against Hinata.  
  
“I want what you want,” he managed to get out. Kissing Hinata’s cheek, Kageyama made sure not to look away from those beautiful brown eyes. He wanted his best friend to know what he meant to him…what he’d done for him. “You’re always there for me when I need you, Shouyou. You’re there to smash my tosses to the other side of the net. You’re there when I take too long to get the joke. You wait for me to make friends at my own pace. You’re even there when I’m being a stubborn bastard, whether I want you there or not.”  
  
Now it was Hinata’s turn to smile softly and place a tender kiss to the wrist of Kageyama’s hand resting on his cheek.  
  
“You’ve done enough waiting on me,” Kageyama asserted, relishing the way Hinata squeezed his eyes shut and the shaky breath that made Kageyama feel he’d managed to convey how much he treasured his partner.  
  
He pressed down into him again, dragging more friction across their lengths beneath their underwear, mouth falling open in a desperate “o” when the skin of his lower abdomen met directly with the fabric that was nearly soaked with Hinata’s precum.  
  
Teeth grazing a ticklish path down Shouyou’s smooth skin, he smiled broadly against Hinata’s bellybutton after slipping Hinata’s briefs off had caused a coarse moan to fall from his chest.  
  
Straddling Hinata’s thighs, Kageyama rose to his knees, feeling electrified by the hungriness in Hinata’s eyes. “Take mine off, Shoyou,” he purred much more confidently.  
  
“ _God help me,_ ” Hinata begged, smacking his head back against the mattress, chest heaving rapidly. He pushed himself up with his elbows, and inched shaky fingers into Tobio’s briefs, pointedly eyeing the darkened spot of fabric wet with Kageyama’s seemingly ceaseless precum. Hinata made sure to slide his hands and fingers wide to cover as much of Kageyama’s rounded ass as possible, while pushing the underwear out of his way.  
  
Kageyama huffed out his pleasure at the feel of those small, rough hands slipping smoothly down the backs of his thighs. Kageyama raised his knees and helped Hinata get the briefs completely off. He backed up slightly, straddling closer to Shouyou’s calves.  
  
Kageyama needed to see him— _all_ of him.  
  
Hinata needed the same.  
  
They both took several long minutes, allowing time for their eyes to fully drink in the sight of flesh laid completely bare, savoring dips and peaks of muscles, each transfixed by precum dripping out and over an unfamiliar but urgently desired cock.  
  
Clenching both his fists and his eyes closed was the only thing keeping Kageyama from trying to touch and taste every part of Hinata all at once.  
  
Shouyou wasn’t as restrained.  
  
Kageyama’s eyes jolted open when he felt fingers wrap around his length, thumb gliding over the cum-slicked head.  
  
What was breathing like, again? How did swallowing work?  
  
Kageyama couldn’t seem to recall either at the moment.  
  
Hinata looked up, face full of expectation. “C-“ he tried, voice so hoarse and raw, he had to stop to clear his throat. “Tobio, can I?” he begged.  
  
“Please,” came Kageyama’s strained reply, and he all but dissolved as Hinata began pumping long, tight strokes over his length.  
  
He forcibly reminded himself that he wanted Shouyou to feel as good as he did. Kageyama’s hand lightly bumped against the other boy’s cock, and just the feather-light touch had Hinata jerking his hips upward, searching for more pressure…more friction.  
  
Kageyama quickly helped him find what he was looking for, stroking over Hinata’s wet member, smearing his thumb across its head, collecting the precum to aid the glide of his hand.  
  
“ _Hn_ …Tobio… _ah_ …it feels so good. _Shit_!” he unintentionally exclaimed, hand flying up to cover his mouth.  
  
Smirking over Hinata’s adorableness, Kageyama couldn’t resist. The two of them still pumping each other firmly, Tobio leaned down and captured those lovely lips with his. He hummed against them thankfully, not able to fully process that this was reality. Hands working between the two of them, slicking abdomens with precum, Hinata jerked his hips upward again, with a tense moan.  
  
When Hinata removed his hand from Kageyama’s length, Kageyama hissed from the loss of sensation. “What are y-?”  
  
“Please,” Hinata whined. “Please, Tobio. I want to feel your weight against me. I want your skin against mine.”  
  
Kageyama’s chest ached at the need in Hinata’s voice, and there was nothing he wanted more than to comply. Releasing his hold on Kageyama’s cock, he ran his hand up his sheet, and curled it gently behind Shouyou’s head. He allowed their foreheads to come together as he settled the full weight of his pelvis on Hinata’s, grinding their erections directly against each other.  
  
His ears were buzzing with a prickling sensation, overwhelmed by the heat their skin created together. Sweat beaded almost immediately, but neither of them cared. It only helped them slide more easily across sensitive flesh.  
  
“Fuck. _Fuuuck_ …you’re evil,” Kageyama growled, after Hinata’s hips began undulating with a rhythm that threatened to undo the entire moment.  
  
“You really think so?” Hinata asked, slowing his motions, actually looking somewhat worried.  
  
“No.” Tobio crooned, “No, of course I don’t… _mmm_ …I don’t think that at all.” He kissed Hinata gently once more and his own eyes widened when he felt Hinata lace the fingers of their hands together, lips brushing across Tobio’s knuckles, before resting them still entwined beside Hinata’s shoulder.  
  
Grinding more quickly again, Hinata stared adoringly into Kageyama’s dark blue orbs. “I meant it, Tobio,” he sighed just above a whisper. “I really, really love you.”  
  
The confession, the intensity of those brown eyes, the quick panting he could almost see…it wasn’t fair. Hinata was so very beautiful and Kageyama didn’t expect he could hold on much longer.  
  
Taking Shouyou’s free hand and placing it flat on Kageyama’s chest over his heart, Kageyama tried to calm himself, but it was no use. “I really, really love you, too, Shouyou,” he said, careful not to break the intimate eye contact.  
  
Hinata’s hips moved even faster and Kageyama found himself pressing even more friction down against his love.  
  
“Hi-Shouyou… _shit_ …I can’t… _nn_ …I can’t hold—“ he stumbled through the words.  
  
“Say it again,” Hinata begged.  
  
Kageyama leaned his full weight down, his skin covering all of Hinata’s available to him. Still holding hands, he breathed against Shouyou’s neck, “I love you. I’m in love with you, and no one else can make me feel this way.”  
  
“ _Nn_ …God… _nn_ …” Hinata groaned through gritted teeth, pulsing hot liquid out across both of them. “Tobio… _oh God, Tobio_!” he sobbed thrusting out of time.  
  
The sound of Hinata crying out his name, the feel of cum on his stomach, the reminder he’d just given himself, that no one else really could make him feel this way…it was over. “ _Sh-Shou…SHIT…I’m coming_!” he cried, his own hips jerking erratically as he painted Hinata sticky with his cum.  
  
It felt so good—so good he thought he might actually cry. He bit down hard at his lower lip, to stem the sensation before he was too overwhelmed, and finished rutting his hips into Hinata’s until they both slowed to a lazy stop.  
  
Rolling over on his back, Kageyama held out an arm, motioning for Hinata to roll himself into the embrace, and the two of them laid like that for god knows how long, waiting for breaths to steady and heartbeats to return to their typical pace.  
  
Idly carding his fingers through orange curls, Kageyama savored the lazy patterns Hinata was tracing on his skin, head peacefully resting against Kageyama’s chest.  
  
“You okay?” Tobio asked, nudging Hinata’s chin, urging him to look up.  
  
Radiantly smiling, Hinata nodded. “Mm-hm,” he hummed, kissing Tobio’s jaw. “Better than okay. Besides, I thought you were the one who was worried about surviving.”  
  
“I’ll kill you,” Kageyama threatened.  
  
“I don’t believe you anymore,” Hinata teased. “Why would you kill me when I’m the only one that can make you feel that way?”  
  
“Oi! I really will kill you, dumbass,” he scowled, placing Hinata in a headlock that had him laughing and kicking to get free.  
  
“I’m sorry! Let go, Kageyama! Let go of me,” he shouted.  
  
“Mm-mm,” Tobio grunted, pulling the smaller boy up next to him once more and squeezing him tightly. “Don’t wanna.”  
  
“Bakageyama, you’re strangling me!” he feigned, with exaggerated choking noises.  
  
“I am not, stupid!” Kageyama complained. “Quit fooling around!”  
  
“Oh,” Hinata purred suggestively. “You want me to quit fooling around with you already?”  
  
“How much more are you going to push me?” Kageyama pouted, flipping over to face the wall.  
  
Still laughing, but resting his chin on Kageyama’s raised shoulder, Hinata said, “I’m done.” After no response, Hinata brushed his lips to the shoulder. “Kageyamaaa? Come on. You know I was kidding.” Smirking, but still not looking back, Kageyama waited for Hinata’s next move. It came in the form of a long, heated, wet kiss just behind Kageyama’s ear. “Won’t you turn around, now? Please?”  
  
Letting out his own short laugh, Kageyama turned over and said, “I was only kidding, too.”  
  
Hinata grinned and settled back down onto Kageyama’s chest, wrapping one of his legs completely across, as Tobio pulled up his thick blanket to cover the two of them snuggly.  
  
“So, what now?” Kageyama asked.  
  
“What do you want to do now?”  
  
“I—I just want to be with you, Hinata.”  
  
“That’s going to be hard, you know? People are cruel. We could lose everything…even the team.” Hinata was watching Kageyama’s face carefully. “I don’t want that for you. I don’t want you getting hurt, and I’m not sure you get how mean some people really are. Their hearts aren’t as big as yours.”  
  
“You think I have a big heart?” Kageyama mused, eyes wide.  
  
“Shut up, loser. You know you do. It’s behind that little shriveled one you pretend is yours,” Hinata joked with a pout, embarrassed at his vulnerability.  
  
“Lose everything?” Kageyama repeated. “Would I lose you?”  
  
Hinata propped himself on his hands and looked firmly at his new boyfriend. “No,” he said decisively, “not ever. I don’t want anyone else to make me feel like you can. I know we just started, but I-“ he gulped down his nerves. “I think I might love you forever,” Hinata rushed out, quickly burying his heated face in the crook of Kageyama’s arm.  
  
Kageyama closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. “Then that’s what I want, Shouyou. If you love me the way I love you, I can survive anything.”  
  
The pair of them laid there talking about everything and nothing until finally drifting off in the wee hours of the morning. Their future would likely be one of struggles, but each boy felt invincible knowing who was by his side.  
  
  
_**End.**  
  
Probably._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> inspired by another one of @reallycorking's art pieces, found here:  
> http://reallyporning.tumblr.com/image/142523819344


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